[SIZE=+2]The psychedelic secrets of Santa Claus[/SIZE]
by Dana Larsen <table align="right" border="0" cellspacing="0" width="96%"> <tbody><tr><td>
Modern Christmas traditions are based on ancient mushroom-using shamans.
Although most people see Christmas as a Christian holiday, most of the symbols and icons we associate with Christmas celebrations are actually derived from the shamanistic traditions of the tribal peoples of pre-Christian Northern Europe.
The sacred mushroom of these people was the red and white amanita muscaria mushroom, also known as "fly agaric." These mushrooms are now commonly seen in books of fairy tales, and are usually associated with magic and fairies. This is because they contain potent hallucinogenic compounds, and were used by ancient peoples for insight and transcendental experiences.
Most of the major elements of the modern Christmas celebration, such as Santa Claus, Christmas trees, magical reindeer and the giving of gifts, are originally based upon the traditions surrounding the harvest and consumption of these most sacred mushrooms.
The world tree
These ancient peoples, including the Lapps of modern-day Finland, and the Koyak tribes of the central Russian steppes, believed in the idea of a World Tree. The World Tree was seen as a kind of cosmic axis, onto which the planes of the universe are fixed. The roots of the World Tree stretch down into the underworld, its trunk is the "middle earth" of everyday existence, and its branches reach upwards into the heavenly realm.
The amanita muscaria mushrooms grow only under certain types of trees, mostly firs and evergreens. The mushroom caps are the fruit of the larger mycelium beneath the soil which exists in a symbiotic relationship with the roots of the tree. To ancient people, these mushrooms were literally "the fruit of the tree."
The North Star was also considered sacred, since all other stars in the sky revolved around its fixed point. They associated this "Pole Star" with the World Tree and the central axis of the universe. The top of the World Tree touched the North Star, and the spirit of the shaman would climb the metaphorical tree, thereby passing into the realm of the gods. This is the true meaning of the star on top of the modern Christmas tree, and also the reason that the super-shaman Santa makes his home at the North Pole.
Ancient peoples were amazed at how these magical mushrooms sprang from the earth without any visible seed. They considered this "virgin birth" to have been the result of the morning dew, which was seen as the semen of the deity. The silver tinsel we drape onto our modern Christmas tree represents this divine fluid.
Reindeer games
The active ingredients of the amanita mushrooms are not metabolized by the body, and so they remain active in the urine. In fact, it is safer to drink the urine of one who has consumed the mushrooms than to eat the mushrooms directly, as many of the toxic compounds are processed and eliminated on the first pass through the body.
It was common practice among ancient people to recycle the potent effects of the mushroom by drinking each other's urine. The amanita's ingredients can remain potent even after six passes through the human body. Some scholars argue that this is the origin of the phrase "to get pissed," as this urine-drinking activity preceded alcohol by thousands of years.
Reindeer were the sacred animals of these semi-nomadic people, as the reindeer provided food, shelter, clothing and other necessities. Reindeer are also fond of eating the amanita mushrooms; they will seek them out, then prance about while under their influence. Often the urine of tripped-out reindeer would be consumed for its psychedelic effects.
This effect goes the other way too, as reindeer also enjoy the urine of a human, especially one who has consumed the mushrooms. In fact, reindeer will seek out human urine to drink, and some tribesmen carry sealskin containers of their own collected piss, which they use to attract stray reindeer back into the herd.
The effects of the amanita mushroom usually include sensations of size distortion and flying. The feeling of flying could account for the legends of flying reindeer, and legends of shamanic journeys included stories of winged reindeer, transporting their riders up to the highest branches of the World Tree.
Santa Claus, super shaman
Although the modern image of Santa Claus was created at least in part by the advertising department of Coca-Cola, in truth his appearance, clothing, mannerisms and companions all mark him as the reincarnation of these ancient mushroom-gathering shamans.
One of the side effects of eating amanita mushrooms is that the skin and facial features take on a flushed, ruddy glow. This is why Santa is always shown with glowing red cheeks and nose. Even Santa's jolly "Ho, ho, ho!" is the euphoric laugh of one who has indulged in the magic fungus.
Santa also dresses like a mushroom gatherer. When it was time to go out and harvest the magical mushrooms, the ancient shamans would dress much like Santa, wearing red and white fur-trimmed coats and long black boots.
These peoples lived in dwellings made of birch and reindeer hide, called "yurts." Somewhat similar to a teepee, the yurt's central smokehole is often also used as an entrance. After gathering the mushrooms from under the sacred trees where they appeared, the shamans would fill their sacks and return home. Climbing down the chimney-entrances, they would share out the mushroom's gifts with those within.
The amanita mushroom needs to be dried before being consumed; the drying process reduces the mushroom's toxicity while increasing its potency. The shaman would guide the group in stringing the mushrooms and hanging them around the hearth-fire to dry. This tradition is echoed in the modern stringing of popcorn and other items.
The psychedelic journeys taken under the influence of the amanita were also symbolized by a stick reaching up through the smokehole in the top of the yurt. The smokehole was the portal where the spirit of the shaman exited the physical plane.
Santa's famous magical journey, where his sleigh takes him around the whole planet in a single night, is developed from the "heavenly chariot," used by the gods from whom Santa and other shamanic figures are descended. The chariot of Odin, Thor and even the Egyptian god Osiris is now known as the Big Dipper, which circles around the North Star in a 24-hour period.
In different versions of the ancient story, the chariot was pulled by reindeer or horses. As the animals grow exhausted, their mingled spit and blood falls to the ground, forming the amanita mushrooms.
St Nicholas and Old Nick
Saint Nicholas is a legendary figure who supposedly lived during the fourth Century. His cult spread quickly and Nicholas became the patron saint of many varied groups, including judges, pawnbrokers, criminals, merchants, sailors, bakers, travelers, the poor, and children.
Most religious historians agree that St Nicholas did not actually exist as a real person, and was instead a Christianized version of earlier Pagan gods. Nicholas' legends were mainly created out of stories about the Teutonic god called Hold Nickar, known as Poseidon to the Greeks. This powerful sea god was known to gallop through the sky during the winter solstice, granting boons to his worshippers below.
When the Catholic Church created the character of St Nicholas, they took his name from "Nickar" and gave him Poseidon's title of "the Sailor." There are thousands of churches named in St Nicholas' honor, most of which were converted from temples to Poseidon and Hold Nickar. (As the ancient pagan deities were demonized by the Christian church, Hold Nickar's name also became associated with Satan, known as "Old Nick!")
Local traditions were incorporated into the new Christian holidays to make them more acceptable to the new converts. To these early Christians, Saint Nicholas became a sort of "super-shaman" who was overlaid upon their own shamanic cultural practices. Many images of Saint Nicholas from these early times show him wearing red and white, or standing in front of a red background with white spots, the design of the amanita mushroom.
St Nicholas also adopted some of the qualities of the legendary "Grandmother Befana" from Italy, who filled children's stockings with gifts. Her shrine at Bari, Italy, became a shrine to St Nicholas.
Modern world, ancient traditions
Some psychologists have discussed the "cognitive dissonance" which occurs when children are encouraged to believe in the literal existence of Santa Claus, only to have their parents' lie revealed when they are older. By so deceiving our children we rob them of a richer heritage, for the actual origin of these ancient rituals is rooted deep in our history and our collective unconscious. By better understanding the truths within these popular celebrations, we can better understand the modern world, and our place in it.
Many people in the modern world have rejected Christmas as being too commercial, claiming that this ritual of giving is actually a celebration of materialism and greed. Yet the true spirit of this winter festival lies not in the exchange of plastic toys, but in celebrating a gift from the earth: the fruiting top of a magical mushroom, and the revelatory experiences it can provide.
Instead of perpetuating outdated and confusing holiday myths, it might be more fulfilling to return to the original source of these seasonal celebrations. How about getting back to basics and enjoying some magical mushrooms with your loved ones this solstice? What better gift can a family share than a little piece of love and enlightenment?
Art by Jimmy Bursenos: solsticestudios.net
Santa Claus was a mushroom.
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Greetings and holiday love, one and all. Not that fake ass holiday love that you get from the aggressive charity collector with the bell and the bucket in front of the supermarket, I offer you all the real ^^^^, just like you get from Grandma.
Christmas is my favorite holiday, and not just because of the fact that you exchange gifts with loved ones, and celebrate, but because I’m aware of the original meaning behind it all.
And what would that be?
Buckle up for a good one…
Santa Claus was a magic mushroom.
What the ^^^^?
Yup, that’s very likely the origin of the original story of Santa Claus; a psychedelic mushroom called the amanita muscaria. I know, I know… it SOUNDS retarded, but that’s probably where it all came from.
The first time I ever heard about this, I was sitting around sacrificing the sacred plant to the fire gods with legendary hemp activist and advocate, Jack Herer, the author of “the emperor wears no clothes.”
He was telling me how he was writing a book about psychedelic mushrooms and their forgotten impact on human culture, including the idea that psychedelics were the origins of most religious experiences.
He then went on to tell me about how the story of Santa Claus was actually about magic mushrooms, but how the story had gotten distorted and forgotten over the thousands of years its been told.
Of course, my first thought when those words came out of his mouth was, “Holy ^^^^. How high is THIS guy?”
Then I thought, “How high am I, that this is making sense?”
Well, Jack went deep into the story for me. Here’s the synopsis, in my words.
Santa Claus is bright red and white. The amanita muscaria is also bright red and white.
Santa Claus lives in the North Pole, and he has flying reindeer pulling his sleigh through the air.
Reindeer are native to Siberia, and the shamanic use of this mushroom in Siberia is well documented. Now, I know Siberia isn’t the North Pole exactly, but it’s pretty close, and the earth’s magnetic pole is actually shifting away from North America and towards Siberia.
Here’s an article about it here:
https://www.livescience.com/forcesofnature/ap_051209_pole_shift.html
Also, the animal most connected with the amanita muscaria mushroom is the reindeer. It’s their favorite food, and although I’ve never talked to a reindeer, I’ve got to think eating that ^^^^ all day must get them high as ^^^^.
Like, “flying” high.
Christmas trees are pine trees.
Pine trees are the trees that the amanita muscaria grows under.
They have a mycorrhizal
https://dictionary.reference.com/browse/mycorrhizal (which basically means non-parasitic) relationship with that plant and spruce trees.
Their shiny red and white caps blooming under the tree looks very much like the tradition of placing shiny wrapped boxes under there.
When people would pick the mushrooms they would place them on the leaves of the tree to dry them in the sun.
That would look an awful lot like when people decorate their trees with shiny ornaments.
People place red and white socks over the fireplace.
OK, first off, why red and white socks? Because again, that’s the color of the mushroom. And why do they hang it in front of the fireplace? Because that was another one of their techniques to dry the mushrooms out for storage.
Santa doesn’t come in through the front door, he hops down through the chimney, on the sneak tip, with a fat bag of goodies.
Well, when Shamanic rituals were forbidden by the rulers of the day, (which they ALWAYS eventually were, because rulers throughout history have realized over and over again that the use of psychedelic substances by their people only serves to make it more difficult to feed them bull^^^^, and keep them scared and stupid) the rituals didn’t immediately stop, they continued in secret, like secretly sneaking into the house through the roof with a fat bag of ‘shrooms.
Santa lived in a magical place where he was surrounded by elves.
Sounds like a tripper to me.
The idea is that the story of Santa was influenced by or created about pre-Christian Pagan Shamans. A Shaman was a psychedelic adventurer that was the man in the village who was most traveled in the world of the mysteries of the mind, and that he would lead others into this world by conducting rituals with this sacred mushroom.
Now I know to a lot of you, all this ^^^^ must SOUND insane.
It certainly did to me when I was first looking into psychedelics.
I thought of psychedelics as “drugs,” and “drugs” were for losers.
Period.
My rule of thumb when it came to “partying” was that I wouldn’t do anything that was addictive, (except drink, of course) and anything else that I would do, (like pot) I would do very, very rarely, and always feel like an idiot the next day for doing it.
Well, the truth is, that’s because I, like most of us, was a victim of propaganda. The “just say no” horse^^^^ that was pumped down America’s throat took root in every one of us that didn’t look into the issue any further.
Our leaders and protectors got on TV and spoke early and often of this monstrous cause of illness and social woes, and they were very passionate about how they were working hard to make them even more illegal, and punish those who would profit from these horrible killers.
Meanwhile they conveniently ignored the biggest killer in the entire drug-land; cigarettes.
Those ^^^^ers kill 400,000 people a year, every year, and you never hear a politician EVER talk about making them illegal.
When was the last time you heard about someone dying from mushrooms?
And then of course the problem comes up of “what exactly is a drug?”
Because they sure as ^^^^ ain’t all the same.
There are some horrible, terrible drugs that turn good people into fiending insects.
But there are also substances that are lumped into that same category that provide experiences so magical, and beautiful, and enlightening that they are thought to be the very origins of religious experience themselves.
That these psychedelic substances which have never killed anyone ever can be lumped into the same group as horrible ^^^^ like methamphetamines just shows how misinformed and confused most people are.
And the fact that people aren’t up in arms about it, just shows how few people are even aware of the situation.
Let’s put it this way – to lump psychedelic mushrooms into the same group as methamphetamine is like lumping the Bible into the same group as Mein Kampf.
I mean ^^^^; they’re both books, right?
Speaking of the Bible, the craziest story about psychedelics and religion EVER has to do with the oldest version of the Bible; the Dead Sea Scrolls.
There was this guy named John Marco Allegro, he was an Oxford scholar and a respected expert of ancient languages, and he was on the international team dedicated to deciphering the scrolls. He wrote one of the earliest books on the scrolls in 1956, and then after 14 years of study in 1970 he dropped the bombshell:
In his book, “The Sacred Mushroom and The Cross” he said he believed through his decoding of the oldest ever version of the bible, that the entire Christian religion as practiced today is originally based on an ancient cult that practiced fertility rituals, and the consumption of psychedelic mushrooms.
He believed that the stories were all in code, and that they were written down to preserve the secrets in the stories, but eventually those secret connections were forgotten, and what was left was all confused.
He even traces the word “Christ” back to an ancient Sumerian word that meant “A mushroom covered in god’s semen.”
Back then they thought that when it rained God was cuming on the earth, and when these mushrooms would magically appear from the ground after the rain, they would eat them and trip their ^^^^ing balls off.
They didn’t want anyone to know about this cool little trick, so they hid it. It was powerful, and it became a great secret.
There are also people that believe that was what the whole “halo” thing was about in religious art. The old school halo’s weren’t those golden Frisbees that you see in today’s religious depictions, they were big circles that made it look like the person had a mushroom cap on their head.
Now, I’m not saying John Marco Allegro is right, because I’m way too retarded to understand the argument completely, but it sort of makes sense to me that if you lived thousands of years ago back when they thought the earth was flat, and monsters lived in the clouds, and one day you were hungry and hunting didn’t work out so well, so you tried some of those pretty mushrooms, and you ate a ton of them… well, I could see how that could be the start of something big.
A realization of connectivity, a dissolving of the ego that brings about a fresh perspective, a transformative experience that causes you to want to create guidelines as to how we should treat our fellow humans as brothers and sisters. And it brings a message that we’re really all one, and love is the only thing that matters.
Basically, it connects you to “God.”
Or… it could just be some stoned bull^^^^, and the ramblings of a mad, renegade Oxford scholar. It could be that Santa, and the tooth fairy, and even the Easter bunny are real beings that actually exist, it’s just that you’re not old enough, or wise enough to know about it yet.
Really, it’s all for your own good.
I mean, how would you go about your day and act like everything is all normal when you know for sure that there’s a giant magical bunny running around the world once a year sneaking into your house and hiding eggs and ^^^^ everywhere?
Maybe that’s what a preacher reading your last rites is all about. They hover over you right before you die, and when you got about 20 minutes left, they drop the bomb on you, “I guess I can tell you now… Santa Claus is real. Say hi to God for me.”
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