"Kingdom of The Crystal Skull" 5 Years Later.

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IrishJedi

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WARNING: LOOOOOOoooooooong. :lol


Today marks five (5) years since the release of INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL.

Of course, the film’s critical reception (among fandom, in particular) has been well-chronicled, particularly on the internet where hyperbole and rhetoric run amok. I’m not interested in re-visiting the extreme opinions on the movie. Instead, I’d rather look back at the film now with a rational, level-headed examination of it and its place in the INDY pantheon.

In short, I still don’t hate the movie like most seem to by default now. In fact, overall I still find it workable, and I think it’s a more worthy installment in its series than the Star Wars prequels were. But I’ll get to that in a bit...

This movie has its fair share of problems and issues. There is really no question about that. However, I think these faults continue to be at least a tad overblown, and many have thrown the baby out with the bathwater with this movie and never looked back. For all its problems, there is still some good stuff here.

After watching it again recently for the first time in a while, I was delighted to see that I still very much enjoy the first 45 minutes or so of the film, not only as a movie … but as an Indy flick. With a few notable exceptions (silly, unnecessary prairie dogs and the cemetery warriors) this movie is pretty good at least up until we get to the Russian jungle camp (more on that in a moment). The opening sequence at “Hangar 51” works, not only as a dive into Indy’s world in this era but also as an homage to the films of this era. Even the ADR (post-recorded dialog) was recorded and mixed with that in mind. Incidentally, these things (along with the movie’s major conceit of playing within the 1950’s sci-fi B-movie pallet) are some of what many don’t like about the film. And that’s too bad. Because if you can wrap your head around and accept that aspect of KOTCS on the surface it becomes much more palatable and enjoyable. At least until the Second Act.

The Hangar 51/Area 51 sequence also features some pretty good Indy action. The chase through the warehouse, culminating in some swashbuckling on chains, a brief fist-fight and then a ride on a rocket sled is pretty close to quintessential, post-RAIDERS Indy. The follow up “Doom Town” sequence is an absolute trip to another era, from the perfectly manicured lawns, cookie-cutter homes, primary-colors and “Leave It To Beaver” aesthetic to the television music. We are right in mid-1950s Americana. Hell, there is in a Good Humor ice cream truck for good measure. And I enjoy the symbolism. It’s a Stepford Wives level façade. The town is fake, and exists only as a test site for the atomic bomb, the true symbol of this early cold war era.

Then… the fridge. This is where the film loses many of its detractors. But I am not among them. As over-the-top and unrealistic as it is, the nuked fridge is just zany Indy fun along the lines of the raft parachute from TEMPLE OF DOOM. I like the fridge bit. I liked in 2008, and I like it now. Sue me. I like Harrison Ford in most of this movie, and his age is never once a problem. Also, there are issues a plenty with this flick, but Harrison Ford and his age are not among them.

From there, we’re taken to a scene in which Indy is debriefed by some G-men. This is actually one of the better scenes in the movie, and Harrison Ford does some great work here. His speech about “that Air Force fiasco in ‘47” absolutely harkens to the Harrison Ford heyday of the early 80s. And the hinted at backstory of Indy as a WWII Special Services operative who went on many missions in both Europe and the Pacific is a tantalizing addition to Indy canon.

From the FBI interrogation scene we’re taken back to the fictional Marshall College. Unfortunately, the death of Denholm Elliott means that the Marcus Brody character couldn’t be here, but the great Jim Broadbent fills in nicely as Stanforth, the Dean at Marshall College. When you think about it, this character actually has some pretty great dialog, too.

Then the Mutt character is introduced, and the film begins to lose even more fans and make more detractors/”haters”. Again, I am not with them. While I’m not a Shia LeBouf fan I believe his screen persona works for certain characters, and this just happens to be one of them. What’s more, he has some genuine screen chemistry with Harrison Ford here. Their scene in the diner is great, and perfectly reflects both characters at the same time. By the time that scene is over, we know everything we need to about this young man already, and Indy’s view of him. That’s good story-telling and good acting.

The diner encounter leads to a very good motorcycle chase scene that works on every necessary level. First, it’s just good stuff, perfectly shot and edited. It has thrills, action, and even comedic moments that aren’t embarrassingly juvenile. And it continues with nice character moments, too. There is a nice moment where Mutt snickers in amusement while Indy gives him a cold stare of disapproval. We’re seeing a mirror reflection of the motorcycle chase sequence from THE LAST CRUSADE here, only this time Indy is the disproving curmudgeon along for the ride.

After the chase scene, we’re back to a quiet moment of exposition between Indy and Mutt, setting up the rest of the story. But because of the chemistry between the two actors even this scene works well and betrays its completely contrived existence.

Indy and Mutt travel to South America. Peru, to be exact. This transition leads to another scene of interesting dialog and banter between the two as they walk through the streets of a village in Nazca. Spielberg also makes neat use of the some very historic sets on the Universal lot here (the village set was used in many of the classic Universal Monster movies). Again, the film is absolutely self-aware of its pulpy origins.

From here, the film goes through a series of scenes that serve mostly as more exposition. But, again, because of the actors and their characters, they remain interesting. After an unnecessarily silly bit with “cemetery warriors”, Indy and Mutt do some actual tomb exploring that again is quintessential INDY. There is even a sublime fulcrum release lever reference (a nod to TEMPLE OF DOOM), for good measure. But let’s go back to those cemetery warriors for a second. They’re not only silly and a tad too specious, this also leads to a moment that I feel completely betrays the Indy character…

During this silly sequence, it’s established that the warriors aren’t just there to do goofy gymnastics and make nonsensical animal sounds… they’re actively trying to KILL Mutt and Indy with poison darts. Why this goes on for more than a few seconds is a question only the filmmakers can answer. Because the fact of the matter is Indy is not defenseless here. He’s armed, with both his trusty whip and his revolver. The Indy of the previous films would have simply cracked the whip and popped a few caps. Done. Not here. He hides, comes out and kills one of the warriors by blowing the poison dart into their mouth in reverse (even worse, it plays as humor) and then… scares away the other by just drawing his gun. So, Indy goes out of his way to kill one of the guys with a poison dart, but his gun is apparently just a prop? This is the current, Politically-Correct Spielberg bringing his personal and political views on firearms and reflecting them, wrongly, onto the character of Indiana Jones. Indy is no pacifist. He’s a rogue. The Indy we know and love would have wasted no time mowing down these clowns. Instead, he’s stuck in a movie where only the bad guys actually use guns. Because… well, P.C. Dumb.

But I digress… After retrieving the Crystal Skull from inside one of the cemetery tombs, Indy and Mutt are captured by turncoat Mac and the Russians. And this is the moment where the film goes off the rails…

Once we get to the Russian camp in the jungle the movie takes a decided turn towards, well, camp. Camp as is campy schlock. While upon examination this entire sequence is an obvious nod (even in tone) to 50’s sci-fi fare like CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON it just doesn’t work. And that’s because it undermines or falsely portrays key characters. Indy comes across as a total pansy in this sequence. And his role as a skeptic towards the existence of aliens also rings hollow. This is a guy who witnessed the Ark of The Covenant lay waste to an entire Nazi platoon, magic rocks glow and bring instant floral life back into an Indian village, and got the cup of Christ from a 500 year old Knight and brought his father back to life. And he’s going to guffaw and poo-poo the idea of aliens and flying saucers to a Russian scientist? Yeah, sure. I know that’s there to reflect the audiences own skepticism, but it just doesn’t ring true. What’s more, it only serves to make Indy look even more foolish.

John Hurt’s odd Oxley character is introduced here. Originally meant to be Abner Ravenwood, Oxley and his skull-induced antics really just feels like an odd, out-of-step addition and it’s difficult to feel any of the supposed fondness and connections that Indy and Mutt have for this guy.

But it’s the appearance of Marion Ravenwood that really stops the movie in its tracks. Simply put, this is not the same character from RAIDERS. Not even close. What was once a spumky, feisty, ***-kicking female character comes out here as a constantly smiling goofball. I think too much blame is put on Karen Allen here. Most of the problems with Marion in this film were developed from the script level on up to Spielberg and how he chose to have her portrayed. Ironically, this (Marion’s character) is one of the few things that Frank Darabont nailed in his version of the INDY IV script that was discarded. And it’s a damn shame, because one of the coolest female characters of all time is turned to a farce here.

Once our heroes escape the Russian camp, we’re treated to a silly banter-filled scene in a quicksand (or “dry sand-base”) pond. Any tension this scene had potential for is stripped away immediately for humor-driven dialog between the characters that just falls completely flat. Indy and Marion are supposedly in peril and about to die and it’s played for laughs. The moment where Indy finds out that Mutt is actually his son is played for a joke. There is absolutely zero emotional resonance here. The scene isn’t a complete and total loss, however. Once Mutt brings out a large rat snake to use as a “rope” Harrison Ford briefly brings out some vintage Indy, almost preferring to sink into the sand to being saved by the snake. It’s a good Indy moment. But it’s fleeting, and surrounded by pure cheese.

Then comes the jungle chase sequence, between several vehicles. This is another frustrating part of the films because it fluctuates between cool stuff (such as Indy jumping from a truck onto a jeep and punching Ruskies) to really bad stuff. That stuff is well-chronicled. Ridiculously staged action (Mutt having a sword fight while straddling two vehicles and getting hit in the nuts by bushes) and one of the worst ideas for an “action scene” in recent memory: Mutt vine-swinging with CGI monkeys. I don’t even need to go further on that one.

The sequence ends on a plateau inhabited by Siafu (“big damn ants”, as Indy calls them). While a lot of the ant stuff is a but over-the-top for my tastes, it’s at least better than had they gone with human-sized ants, which was my fear when I’d first heard of this sequence (a long-standing Lucas idea) being shoe-horned into the movie. Siafu are even an actual legend, so there's that, I guess.

I don’t even want to talk about the nonsensical cliff-jumping onto a tree by Marion thing. I really don’t. I’ll just say that this whole sequence (from start to where the group of heroes is back on land) is easily one of the movie’s nadirs. Even upon first viewing in 2008 I was uncomfortable with it. And it seals the deal on Marion: she’s horrible in this film.

Now, the Akator stuff I like. This sequence features some of the coolest sets in any recent movie. This includes the huge obelisk, which was actually functional (the pillars actually moved)! Having been to Belize and seen many Mayan ruins up close I can also appreciate the attention to detail and authenticity of the design.

Now, the alien/ufo thing. The only thing that bugs me here is the CGI alien and how utterly photo unrealistic it looks. I believe this is the part of the film that lost the last of the movie’s detractors. Just seeing an actual alien (and flying saucer) in an Indiana Jones movie was just too much for some people. But, truth be told, I have no problem with that at all as a concept. I have no issues whatsoever with the 1957 time frame and setting of the movie, and I even like UFO/Alien (“inter-dimensional beings” or whatever) aspects. I just don’t like that damned CGI alien. And at least we were spared the “Welcome to Earth.” line before Indy shoots the alien in the Darabont script. As weak as KOTCS is at times, at least it never stooped to directly quoting (lifting, in fact) an annoying Will Smith line from MEN IN BLACK.

And so the movie ends with a bit of a whimper after the flying saucer reveal. So more poorly written banter between the main characters leads to Indy and Marion’s wedding. This is a scene that should have had a huge emotional and nostalgic impact for those of us who were weaned on RAIDERS and the original Indy trilogy. Instead, it’s yet another aspect of the movie that falls flat because of the way the characters are portrayed throughout the film. Once again, this is not the same Marion Ravenwood. And her chemistry with Indy is so completely off in the movie that their wedding simply does not resonate. An unfortunate side effect of what is, overall, a mess of a script.
So, that’s it. In the end, this film does not ruin the legacy of Indiana Jones for me like it does for some. In fact, it even added a few neat things to the mythos. And it’s mostly an enjoyable cinematic ride. It’s just replete with nagging issues. That said, it’s not on the same level as the Star Wars prequels for me. Here, Indy is still Indy, despite Harrison Ford’s age and despite some ridiculous situations and scenes the writers and filmmakers put him in.

KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL now sits at the bottom (#4) on my list of favorite INDY movies. But it’s still not a chasm of distance between it and the others. While I still love TEMPLE OF DOOM (to whit, it’s the one INDY movie that is most like an actual 30’s pulp serial) and have grown nostalgically fond of THE LAST CRUSADE, it is still RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK that sits alone and a genre masterpiece. I won’t begrudge KOTCS for failing to touch it. And no matter what anyone says, despite its myriad of facepalms it doesn't tarnish the legacy of RAIDERS or this great franchise.

6/10
 
I've still only seen this movie 3 times at most, but I must say it was better when I watched it again than it was the first time.
 
I watched the films over the weekend and stopped at the jungle camp scene in KOTCS. I just couldn't muster the energy to go any further. I agree with a lot of what you wrote. I think KOTCS is actually good right up to that point. Love the beginning of it. Like you said, it's classic Indy. LOVE the fake neighborhood and nuke scene. I think it's hilarious as Indy is definitely out of place in all the cheeriness and color. Even the chemistry between him and Shia is good, but once we get to the jungle...ugh. I don't know what happened. It has a completely different feel and style. It's like someone else took over in the filmmaking. Like everyone put heart into it and then just gave up and got lazy.

I don't hate the film, but I can easily ignore it. This film is the reason why I don't want another one made.
 
Good post. I have to agree with most of what you said. While KOTCS is not my favorite Indy film by a long shot, I still enjoy breaking it out and watching it a couple times a year.
 
Didn't even know there was one. I'm surprised anyone took the time and effort. What is it about 30-45 mins long? :lol

It's about 90 minutes long and pretty damn watchable. It removed a lot of the stuff I had problems with (fridge, gophers, giant ants).
 
The fridge is awesome but it is the finale. You can't top a mushroom cloud ...thats story telling 101

Spielberg himself has done interviews where he discusses that concept with Jaws and the fact that the shark exploding at the end with the gas bottle was absurd but it doesn't matter because its the end of the great ride.
 
Nice to read such a well thought out, intelligent criticism of the movie.

While I agree with most of what you said, I don't think the quality drops so dramatically when we get to the jungle. And that's because the quality was toeing the line all along! The jungle is just the point where it goes below the line and stays there til the obelisk!

But seriously, you guys might know I'm one of the few that was generally ok with the movie and put it above Last Crusade. I just knew what to expect from the filmmaking geniuses who brought us The Phantom Menace and the Last Crusade. I was expecting a light hearted, goofy, silly adventure, and it delivered. There were some decent sequences, like the car chase through the college and the whole obelisk scene. And I actually lolled at the banter between the three leads in the quicksand scene. I enjoyed it and I will always reach for it before I will ever reach to watch LC.

One thing I truly and thoroughly enjoyed was the music. One of JW's best and I place it right below Raiders. I've definitely listened to the soundtrack more than I've watched the movie!
 
The fridge never bothered me, either. The biggest problem I have with the movie is every villains death is due in part to their own actions. Indy draws his gun once, but never fires. The only person he kills, is the native with the blowgun. There is no glimpse at all of the Indy who shot the Cairo swordsman.

Even Mutt, as a character and sidekick, didn't bother me. 'The Beef' is a decent actor, and has a passing resemblance to Harrison Ford to make it believable that he could be Indy's son. That said, the Tarzan swing is inexcusable and entirely the fault of the buffoon that wrote that scene.
 
Haven't seen this since I sat in the theaters and walked out thinking "What the **** was that!?!" Maybe I should try watching it again.
 
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