trying to hook up with a girl, in tricky circumstances

hey fellas. been a while since i started a thread here, but im in a little crisis and stupid friends cant help me . so, i thought why not come here to a familiar and friendly place where i can get more than one opinion.

So, basically i am trying to hook up with a girl, but doing it is harder than i expected because this is no ordinary "boyfriend-girlfriend" thing. I just turned 16 in February and i am in grade 11. There is a girl who ive seen now, maybe three or four times, including one time where she spoke at a cancer presentation in our school (she is actually a cancer survivor and is missing her leg below the knee) and she is beautiful. She unfortunately, is only in grade 9, doesn't share any of the same classes with me or even lunch, and so as you can imagine its gonna be hard to approach her without seeming like an awkward "helper" rather than a friend/boyfriend type. Im afraid that if i could muster up the courage to talk to her, people around us would think its just because i feel bad for her, which of course is not my intention at all, i just want to get to know her. But my main question is, what the hell do i say to her? I really have NO clue, and i dont want to be awkward either.

so, can any of you sideshow freaks tell me anything i dont already know (i.e. ; sharing common interests, talking to her friends/teachers ect.)
if only batman where here to solve this problem

9th grade is too early to date.

Grade 9 girls love the older guys. You can say anything you wan't, she is already yours.

pixletwin said:

9th grade is too early to date.

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not in my school

You might wanna ask her dad's opinion on that.

don't worry yourself over what others may perceive... not at school or on this forum. just be you and let others deal.

pixletwin said:

You might wanna ask her dad's opinion on that.

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well im not talking about, you know.. "diving in" or anything just steady stuff

automaton said:

don't worry yourself over what others may perceive... not at school or on this forum. just be you and let others deal.

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ah young love! i was such a dweeb in HS. so many girls i just wanted to talk to and didn't have the guts. once i graduated the world was mine however. lol.

seriously, if you just see her and say "hey, my name is ___" then its a good start. young people naturally like to make friends, so its not going to look weird introducing yourself.

If you need specifics, telling her she did a good job on her presentation (without dwelling on the topic) is probably a good compliment that she would like. As her what she likes to do outside of school and invite her on a date with other friends.

The other thing you could do is see if you have a mutual friend...and use them to introduce you.

Good luck!

I will tell you though from experience. Chicks don't dig stalkers. So if your gonna say hello, just go up and do it. In the old days before I got guts I used to follow them around...trying to muster the right words to say. This freaks them out...yeah I know, who knew?

Try to find out who her friends are, and if you know any of them (or any of your friends do). You could then get "invited" to something that a bunch of people are doing (including her ofcourse). That way you could talk to her, it wouldn't be awkward, and she would feel comfortable since she is in a group.

That's essentially how I met my wife.

ProgMatinee said:

I will tell you though from experience. Chicks don't dig stalkers. So if your gonna say hello, just go up and do it. In the old days before I got guts I used to follow them around...trying to muster the right words to say. This freaks them out...yeah I know, who knew?

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well hopefully ill get me some courage from the wizard before something like that ever happens

toyreveewer said:

hey fellas. been a while since i started a thread here, but im in a little crisis and stupid friends cant help me . so, i thought why not come here to a familiar and friendly place where i can get more than one opinion.

So, basically i am trying to hook up with a girl, but doing it is harder than i expected because this is no ordinary "boyfriend-girlfriend" thing. I just turned 16 in February and i am in grade 11. There is a girl who ive seen now, maybe three or four times, including one time where she spoke at a cancer presentation in our school (she is actually a cancer survivor and is missing her leg below the knee) and she is beautiful. She unfortunately, is only in grade 9, doesn't share any of the same classes with me or even lunch, and so as you can imagine its gonna be hard to approach her without seeming like an awkward "helper" rather than a friend/boyfriend type. Im afraid that if i could muster up the courage to talk to her, people around us would think its just because i feel bad for her, which of course is not my intention at all, i just want to get to know her. But my main question is, what the hell do i say to her? I really have NO clue, and i dont want to be awkward either.

so, can any of you sideshow freaks tell me anything i dont already know (i.e. ; sharing common interests, talking to her friends/teachers ect.)
if only batman where here to solve this problem

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Just that... ask her if you two could meet up somewhere for a soda or if you could give her a call to talk....




And, you're gonna be awkward at first anyway.....it will pass though.

toyreveewer said:

well im not talking about, you know.. "diving in" or anything just steady stuff

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Even still. Don't go steaduy until you are in your 20's. Be young and have fun with her. You're both too young to get as serious as "steady".

My opinion, mind.

Definitely go up and say hi - maybe tell her you thought her speech was inspiring. Are there any social events at school where maybe you would have the opportunity to talk to her?

Jen said:

Definitely go up and say hi - maybe tell her you thought her speech was inspiring. Are there any social events at school where maybe you would have the opportunity to talk to her?

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actually now that you mention it there is a cancer rally-thingy at school in i think like a month or so that she might be at. but you have to raise like 300 bucks or sumthin just to get in. i might have to get a job, but ill see what i can do.

Chicks dig guys with jobs.

lol)

toyreveewer said:

actually now that you mention it there is a cancer rally-thingy at school in i think like a month or so that she might be at. but you have to raise like 300 bucks or sumthin just to get in. i might have to get a job, but ill see what i can do.

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Well that's a very good reason for you to approach her. Maybe say hi and ask her if she is going to be attending.

pixletwin said:

Chicks dig guys with jobs.

lol)

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Wrong! Chicks dig guys with money. Its just to have money guys need jobs.

pixletwin said:

Chicks dig guys with jobs.

lol)

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as long as its not mcdonlds i think i can survive it.

toyreveewer said:

as long as its not mcdonlds i think i can survive it.

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Don't knock McDonald's. Everyone has to start somewhere. I have a lot more respect for someone who has a job than someone with no job. Complimenting her speech is great advice and would be an excellent ice breaker.